Stuff and Things

Wow, Mother’s Day already! I can’t believe how fast this year is going! I am quadruply blessed to have the 4 greatest daughters in the world. Megan & Kaitlin called me from Kansas this morning, which of course made me cry those happy mommy tears that only another mother could understand. As I told Kaitlin, I know I’m not their real mother, but I love them like they’re my own. It makes me very happy that they took the time and effort to call me on Mother’s Day. And Megan’s e-card was hilarious!

I also had a great day celebrating with my own Mother and nuclear family. We didn’t do anything fancy, mostly watched a Ranger’s game and visited, but it was great just getting to spend time with my family. I am very fortunate to have nearly my entire family all in the DFW Metroplex. We spent a little bit of time this evening with the extended family (uncles, aunt, and grandmother) having hot dogs, watermelon and just getting to spend valuable time with loved ones. It’s been such a whirlwind year that I’m glad we were able to carve out some family time. Mikayla was quite entertaining showing off her tree-climbing skills and her natural way with animals. Gwen was rested enough to be sociable and made GiGi’s and my aunt (her grand-aunt) Jan’s day by letting them both have some baby holding time. This is a first since prior to now, Gwen would fuss on anybody except Todd, Noni or me (and occasionally let PawPaw hold her). She had a gold star night!

We did miss Lincoln and Christy, who were out of town, but hopefully will get to see them soon. Once you get to Mother’s Day, family time gets really frequent with Memorial Day, Father’s Day, and birthdays for Gran Gran, Frazier, Jan, Joe+me, and Mikayla all within a 5 week span. Okay enough yammering, here are a few pictures from today.

What a great day! Yay!

This will be the first of many “How-To” tutorials for Dallas / Fort Worth Drivers. While I understand that we may be discussing some very advanced concepts, but for the love of all things good/bad/small/large, we must do our very best to try to grasp these potentially life-saving concepts.

Our first lesson will be a “Yield” Sign.

According to the dictionary:

yield - (verb used with object) - 1. to give up or over; relinquish or resign: to yield the floor to the senator from Texas. 2. to surrender or submit, as to superior power: The rebels yielded after a week. 3. to give place or precedence (usually fol. by to): to yield to another; Will the senator from Texas yield?

This is what a Yield sign looks like.

I know that you have seen them many times along the side of the road, but from I’ve been able to determine, many do not know or understand the meaning and purpose of this common road sign.

A “Yield” sign means that you MUST give up the right of way to the vehicles on the through road, or the vehicles in the lane on the same side as the sign.

In lay speak… when you are barreling down an on ramp like a bat out of hell trying to beat the traffic currently occupying the lane you need to get onto… and there is a “Yield” sign, you CANNOT continue to increase speed and swerve violently in front off or into the car that is already occupying that space. Per the Laws of Physics, two distinct objects cannot occupy the same space at the same time. Trust me… this has been proven over and over again. If there is a car right next to you, it is impossible for you to somehow slide under or through this car to get into the desired lane.

Nor should you assume that the driver will somehow receive your Amazing Karnac mental signals and know that an absolute and rude idiot is about to do something stupid. Chances are… if you are incapable of understanding a Yield sign, your mental prowess and ability to communicate telepathetically will be hampered.

Whenever you see this sign, you MUST “Yield” or give up the right of way to the vehicle next to you.

I can hear you asking yourselves now… “But, Todd, how will I know if I’m not yielding properly?” The telltale signs that you did not properly yield the right of way should be easy to notice. Below are the most common signs:

1. You hear a loud BANG or CRUNCH, and suddenly all of the contents inside of your car will begin to “float” and bounce around like you are inside of a giant popcorn machine. Typically, this will end with your car suddenly slowing down on its own.
2. You will hear lots of honking from the car next to you. Most times, this will also be accompanied by a single finger being waved directly at you.
3. You may see the car next to you taking an immediate dive off the road into a ditch.
4. You suddenly notice that all of the vehicles around you are suddenly swerving and going in unusual directions like little crazy clown cars… except no one will be wearing any clown make-up.
5. Or, in the case of close calls, you will glance back into your rear view mirror [assuming you have one and know how to use it] and will notice that you can tell that the driver in the car behind you has some pepper stuck in their teeth. Typically, this will also coincide with item #2.

So there you have it! The first of many DFW driver’s training lessons. I hope that you have found this to be educational.